I will never forget September 2013. This month brought changes to my life that will live with me for forever. In September 2013, my nephew Landon, as described in an earlier post, was born very premature due to prenatal complications. You can also read about his story here. Though my sweet baby nephew was tiny and here only briefly, his life story will "move mountains" as his Aunt Casey once described. He has drawn grown, independent men closer to their Maker. He has brought me to my knees in thanksgiving and praise for my family, something I too often took for granted prior to his birth. He has brought healing in our families - nothing sweeter than seeing siblings band together to comfort one another in a time of crisis and tragedy. Landon has given my brother, Matt, and his wife, Katie an incredible calming peace and has joined them as an unbreakable force - they are truly the strongest people I know. Landon has touched people whom he never met; who myself or my family will never know. And I could continue....
During this time, I could not bring myself to blog about my family. The guilt that filled me (and still does if I allow it) literally could take my breath away. Not a day goes by that I don't think about Landon. He and my son, TJ, were supposed to be buddies. I had dreamt of summers spent making memories in the fields of my family's farm in Arkansas with our boys. This. Is. So. Hard. And I am just his Aunt! I love Matt and Katie and hurt so badly for them....the loss of a child is just not natural. It is just not how things were meant. And yet, God intended for Landon's life to happen just as it did. At Landon's graveside service, our pastor, Brother Tony, reminded us that we live in a sinful world where bad, horrible things will happen. But God's promise to us remains hopeful and good. We probably will never know God's full purpose in Landon's life - but I know it is great purpose, one that only a pure, precious child could deliver.
1 Corinthians 2:9
But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him"
I am also comforted by God's promise that one day in Heaven will all be reunited. Our pain will finally be healed.
Revelation 21:4 - And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
I love you sweet baby boy...truly as if you were my own. You will live forever in our memories. I promise that your life and memory will be honored each day that I choose to be a good Mommy to my children and each time we speak of you as a way to share God's love and provision. Your life WILL move mountains. I am so very thankful that God gave you to us, even if for just a short time. Landon Harold Lewis - your face is now what comes to mind when I hear the words fighter and warrior.
Us.
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
TJ's First Visitors
We are one loved family. We had a steady stream of family come to visit during TJ's first month of life. We were also blessed with a beautiful church family who brought us meals and kind words - just another confirmation from God that TX is where he intends for our family to be right now. My father brought his mother for a long weekend visit, my Godmother Miss Carol came down from north Arkansas, a dear family friend from Pennsylvania, Miss Cindy, stopped by as she was passing through Dallas. We also had a weeklong visit from Lola and Grampy (John's parents)! Our family members who couldn't be here with us sent loving messages, gifts, and cards - we love you all. Thank you so much.
Baby Landon
The week before our planned trip home to Huntsville I was awakened by an early morning message from my Dad. Matthew and Katie were at the hospital - Katie's water had broken. She was only 24 weeks along in her pregnancy. Tears and prayers immediately began to flow. She was admitted to the hospital and the plan was to keep her on antibiotics with hopes to keep her pregnant for another 3-4 weeks. Landon was strong and holding his own.
One week later, late on a Saturday night, Katie began to experience strong pain. She might be in labor. (John and I had arrived the day before on a previously planned week long visit.) The family was called and we all waited nervously to see what the tests would say. The doctors believed she was experiencing gastrointestinal issues, but not labor. We relaxed a little and returned home. In less than an hour after returning home we received a desperate phone call from Matt - Katie had delivered Baby Landon in her antepartum room and they didn't know if he would survive. And so Landon's sweet story begins in the wee hours of Sunday, September 1st, 2013.
Landon was quickly stabilized and had a strong heart beat. He weighed just shy of two pounds at 1.14 ounces and measured a tiny thirteen inches long. Immediate family members were allowed access to him. "He. Is. Perfect." That was all this proud aunt could say - that and "Thank you Jesus". Everything was a blur during the next 72 hours. Baby Landon was critical, but holding his own. A heart murmur was detected, but it was found that his Patent Ductus Arteriosus vessel was still open. This vessel typically closes prior to birth or in the days just following birth. This condition is usually manageable with medication. So the medicine was started, but Landon's watchful and knowledgeable nurses and doctors realized quickly that something was very wrong with Landon's heart. An echocardiogram later identified severe aortic stenosis and the medication aimed to close the PDA was stopped. These actions absolutely saved Landon's life that day. The open PDA is what was providing blood flow to the left ventricle of Landon's heart. A closed PDA would have, more than likely, been fatal. The doctors in Huntsville knew that Landon could no longer be provided the care that he needed there so Landon was transferred by ground to UAB. Time stood still on Friday, September 6th. We all tearfully prayed and worried. After arriving at UAB it was clear that precious Landon was in the best place possible for the care he needed.
UAB gave us hope that once Landon was stabilized his little heart could be fixed (in time). The plan now was to keep Landon infection free and for him to grow - slowly, so that his heart would not endure any unnecessary stress.
As of Monday, September 9th, Landon continues to do well at UAB. Further echocardiograms performed yesterday show that the left ventricle, while small, is not as damaged as previously thought. Also, the doctors all believe that based on several factors such as skin thickness, lung function, etc that Landon appears to be developmentally ahead of his 25 week gestation at birth. Praise the Lord!
You can follow Landon's story on his own blog, here. I can't wait to be blown away by all that God has in store for him and our family.
Please pray for my sweet nephew, his parents, and his medical care providers. As my sister-in-law, said, "God is still writing Landon's story" and I know without a doubt that Landon's life will bring about some very special Kingdom work. Praise be to Him for the miracles we have seen!
One week later, late on a Saturday night, Katie began to experience strong pain. She might be in labor. (John and I had arrived the day before on a previously planned week long visit.) The family was called and we all waited nervously to see what the tests would say. The doctors believed she was experiencing gastrointestinal issues, but not labor. We relaxed a little and returned home. In less than an hour after returning home we received a desperate phone call from Matt - Katie had delivered Baby Landon in her antepartum room and they didn't know if he would survive. And so Landon's sweet story begins in the wee hours of Sunday, September 1st, 2013.
Landon was quickly stabilized and had a strong heart beat. He weighed just shy of two pounds at 1.14 ounces and measured a tiny thirteen inches long. Immediate family members were allowed access to him. "He. Is. Perfect." That was all this proud aunt could say - that and "Thank you Jesus". Everything was a blur during the next 72 hours. Baby Landon was critical, but holding his own. A heart murmur was detected, but it was found that his Patent Ductus Arteriosus vessel was still open. This vessel typically closes prior to birth or in the days just following birth. This condition is usually manageable with medication. So the medicine was started, but Landon's watchful and knowledgeable nurses and doctors realized quickly that something was very wrong with Landon's heart. An echocardiogram later identified severe aortic stenosis and the medication aimed to close the PDA was stopped. These actions absolutely saved Landon's life that day. The open PDA is what was providing blood flow to the left ventricle of Landon's heart. A closed PDA would have, more than likely, been fatal. The doctors in Huntsville knew that Landon could no longer be provided the care that he needed there so Landon was transferred by ground to UAB. Time stood still on Friday, September 6th. We all tearfully prayed and worried. After arriving at UAB it was clear that precious Landon was in the best place possible for the care he needed.
UAB gave us hope that once Landon was stabilized his little heart could be fixed (in time). The plan now was to keep Landon infection free and for him to grow - slowly, so that his heart would not endure any unnecessary stress.
As of Monday, September 9th, Landon continues to do well at UAB. Further echocardiograms performed yesterday show that the left ventricle, while small, is not as damaged as previously thought. Also, the doctors all believe that based on several factors such as skin thickness, lung function, etc that Landon appears to be developmentally ahead of his 25 week gestation at birth. Praise the Lord!
You can follow Landon's story on his own blog, here. I can't wait to be blown away by all that God has in store for him and our family.
Please pray for my sweet nephew, his parents, and his medical care providers. As my sister-in-law, said, "God is still writing Landon's story" and I know without a doubt that Landon's life will bring about some very special Kingdom work. Praise be to Him for the miracles we have seen!
Cousin Natalie Has Arrived!
Exactly one month after TJ was born, my brother Nathan and his wife Ashley welcomed their daughter Natalie into the world. There were some complications, but both mom and baby are doing great. She has fuzzy strawberry blonde hair and looks so much like her daddy. We love you too Baby Natalie and can't wait to meet you in person! I wish I was more computer savvy so that I could transfer your Daddy's files to my computer - but I can't. I promise to share more of your adorableness in very soon.
TJ's Story
Every baby deserves to have the story of their birth written and remembered. TJ's story just happens to be a pretty exciting one.
My mom arrived on my 37th week. I was having regular contractions morning, noon, and night so we were all SO thankful that she was here. But I still wasn't ready - nursery wasn't complete, the crib was still in the box (and truthfully STILL is!), clothes to be sorted and washed, etc. Mom helped organize me and chased FC around while I tried to get things done. It was pretty clear that I desperately needed an IKEA trip so we made plans to make it an adventure for FC on Friday, July 12th.
The morning of our big shopping trip I felt nothing out of the ordinary...not a single contraction since the day before. We loaded up FC and double checked our shopping lists so that we could "grab and go" quickly - you know how short a 15 month old's attention span can be! As we pulled into IKEA's parking lot I started to feel some contractions that I thought were fairly strong. Having been induced with FC I wasn't for sure what real labor would be like. My nurse on-call assured me that the contractions would need to be regularly happening at set intervals and that I probably wouldn't be able to talk or walk when the contractions were serious enough to go to the hospital. OKAY! I was fine then. We shopped. I contracted. I didn't pay attention because they didn't hurt too bad and I was definitely still walking and talking. As we started home I mentioned to Mom that maybe she should help me keep track because the contractions weren't going away. Well, the contractions had no regular intervals or duration. But they were starting to hurt. However, I could still talk and I was fairly certain I could still walk because I was driving the car! That changed quickly as we were pulling into our subdivision. I could still walk and talk (barely) so I managed to change FC's diaper and put her down for her nap. I called John and told him to head home. Then. I. Lost. It. Within a few minutes I was pretty sure I would be giving birth in our home if we didn't go NOW. So my dear, wonderful, saintly mother (I owe you big, Mom - I know!!) scooped FC out of her bed and began driving me to the hospital.
But WAIT...it gets better. Her first question to me: "How do we get there?". I had no idea how to get to the hospital! John and I were going to "trial run it" the next day. But, thank you Google Maps, the hospital was found. I groaned in the front seat, worried I'd scare my other baby in the back seat. I cussed at red lights and slow people in the fast lane. I snapped at my poor Mom. But we made it. Barely...
I was worried about my sensitive FC's take on all this so I told Mom to drop me at the front door - she literally rolled up, I jumped out, hobbled in, and Mom drove away. The front desk staff offered me directions to labor and delivery, but the next sounds they heard coming from my mouth made it clear that I would need assistance. The lady wheeled me to where I needed to be...my greeting to the floor nurses was, "I need an epidural. I know I'm close. Call anesthesia now because I know it can take them awhile to get here." My head nurse assured me I probably had time. I assured her I did not. "I'm not a natural girl! I promise!!". I was checked and the nurse darted from the room. I was worried! She came back and said she ran to tell my anesthesiologist to hurry - she didn't know if I'd have time for meds. Ughh. I am NOT a natural girl. Now I really wanted my husband there - I started asking random nurses flowing in and out of my room if they has seen a "lost Asian man wandering around". Anesthesiology showed up about the same time John walked in the door. So thankful to see him. My anesthesiologist. I told John to stop smiling through gritted teeth and pain. Meds were in and my OB had arrived. My doctor told me that I might have 10 minutes before it'd be time to push. YAY - I was so excited to meet my TJ!
In less than 10 minutes it was time and two pushes later Trenton Jameson Lindgren was welcomed into the world at 4:44 P.M.. He weighed 7.4 pounds and measured 21 inches long. We were so very happy. The delivery was such an easy one that the room quickly cleared. It was bliss to watch my son open his eyes for the first time, to nurse quietly and calmly, and to feel him snuggle into our arms with such contentment. Love at first sight.
TJ is another undeserved blessing in our life that God entrusted to us. We love you TJ and thank God every day for you!
My mom arrived on my 37th week. I was having regular contractions morning, noon, and night so we were all SO thankful that she was here. But I still wasn't ready - nursery wasn't complete, the crib was still in the box (and truthfully STILL is!), clothes to be sorted and washed, etc. Mom helped organize me and chased FC around while I tried to get things done. It was pretty clear that I desperately needed an IKEA trip so we made plans to make it an adventure for FC on Friday, July 12th.
The morning of our big shopping trip I felt nothing out of the ordinary...not a single contraction since the day before. We loaded up FC and double checked our shopping lists so that we could "grab and go" quickly - you know how short a 15 month old's attention span can be! As we pulled into IKEA's parking lot I started to feel some contractions that I thought were fairly strong. Having been induced with FC I wasn't for sure what real labor would be like. My nurse on-call assured me that the contractions would need to be regularly happening at set intervals and that I probably wouldn't be able to talk or walk when the contractions were serious enough to go to the hospital. OKAY! I was fine then. We shopped. I contracted. I didn't pay attention because they didn't hurt too bad and I was definitely still walking and talking. As we started home I mentioned to Mom that maybe she should help me keep track because the contractions weren't going away. Well, the contractions had no regular intervals or duration. But they were starting to hurt. However, I could still talk and I was fairly certain I could still walk because I was driving the car! That changed quickly as we were pulling into our subdivision. I could still walk and talk (barely) so I managed to change FC's diaper and put her down for her nap. I called John and told him to head home. Then. I. Lost. It. Within a few minutes I was pretty sure I would be giving birth in our home if we didn't go NOW. So my dear, wonderful, saintly mother (I owe you big, Mom - I know!!) scooped FC out of her bed and began driving me to the hospital.
But WAIT...it gets better. Her first question to me: "How do we get there?". I had no idea how to get to the hospital! John and I were going to "trial run it" the next day. But, thank you Google Maps, the hospital was found. I groaned in the front seat, worried I'd scare my other baby in the back seat. I cussed at red lights and slow people in the fast lane. I snapped at my poor Mom. But we made it. Barely...
I was worried about my sensitive FC's take on all this so I told Mom to drop me at the front door - she literally rolled up, I jumped out, hobbled in, and Mom drove away. The front desk staff offered me directions to labor and delivery, but the next sounds they heard coming from my mouth made it clear that I would need assistance. The lady wheeled me to where I needed to be...my greeting to the floor nurses was, "I need an epidural. I know I'm close. Call anesthesia now because I know it can take them awhile to get here." My head nurse assured me I probably had time. I assured her I did not. "I'm not a natural girl! I promise!!". I was checked and the nurse darted from the room. I was worried! She came back and said she ran to tell my anesthesiologist to hurry - she didn't know if I'd have time for meds. Ughh. I am NOT a natural girl. Now I really wanted my husband there - I started asking random nurses flowing in and out of my room if they has seen a "lost Asian man wandering around". Anesthesiology showed up about the same time John walked in the door. So thankful to see him. My anesthesiologist. I told John to stop smiling through gritted teeth and pain. Meds were in and my OB had arrived. My doctor told me that I might have 10 minutes before it'd be time to push. YAY - I was so excited to meet my TJ!
In less than 10 minutes it was time and two pushes later Trenton Jameson Lindgren was welcomed into the world at 4:44 P.M.. He weighed 7.4 pounds and measured 21 inches long. We were so very happy. The delivery was such an easy one that the room quickly cleared. It was bliss to watch my son open his eyes for the first time, to nurse quietly and calmly, and to feel him snuggle into our arms with such contentment. Love at first sight.
TJ is another undeserved blessing in our life that God entrusted to us. We love you TJ and thank God every day for you!
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